Greetings from nienna
A place for me to muse, rant and mutter to herself.
Remember that these are my thoughts and may not always jive with your own. Note: This blog contains Adult Material and is not suited for those under 18 years of age.
nienna
xxx
There comes a time when one has to realize that they are ruined beyond repair. When time after time you are shown that you arent good enough, arent special enough, arent pretty enough, you finally believe it and stop trying. When you have been used, lied to, betrayed and tossed aside like old garbage for the last time. When your heart cant take it anymore. You finally realize there is no happy ending, no white picket fence with happy children playing. No sense of completion with a band of steel around your throat. No ring, church bells or whips to mark the occassion that will never come.
To every man i have ever known. From father to casual aquintance, thank you for finally getting it through to me. i finally see there is no happily ever after.
To spend my life alone and crying for what will never be i have finally come to accept.
You should all be proud. You took what was once a happy, devoted slave eager to please and offer her submission and destroyed her once open, loving heart.
n
P.S. i wonder if Richmond, Virginia will ever have the balls to leave a message instead of just lurking.
Posted at 5:29 PM
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Thursday, March 12, 2009
-Fucking Done-
Why havent i posted recently? Because i can be arsed to bother. i dont have anything positive or insightful to say or offer. And if someone tells me i'm just in a funk or having a bad day? They well get assfucked. i have had nothiing but bad days and funks for months. There is no light at the end of the tunnel, there are no sunny days, and there is no happily ever after. And i swear by all that is holy if one more person tells me to just think positive tomorrow will be better, i think i might do someone bodily harm.
i am fucking done supporting other people's kids and being shit on for it when it leaves me so finacially broken that i have to give up my home to save myself. And i am the bad guy. FUCK YOU!!!!! i am fucking done helping or supporting other people finacially or emotionally and being stabbed in the back for it by so called friends.
i am done with men. Period. i have been toyed, played, and fucked over for the last time. DO NOT MESSAGE ME TELLING ME MY ONE IS OUT THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i have nothing left to offer, nothing left to give but emptiness, coldness and a icehearted bitch. Dont like it, dont come here.
n
Posted at 6:40 PM
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Thursday, February 26, 2009
-The Scent of a Rose-
Been rather busy lately. Work is chaotic and life moves on at its pace. There is someone i have talked to for a long time. Nearly a year now. Its been on and off again since we met. Lets see what happens.
Posted at 4:30 PM
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Friday, February 20, 2009
-Good News, Bad News-
Sorry i havent posted, been rather busy this week. i have an appt to have some new pictures taken this weekend. Looking forward to it, some nice new erotic pics. Hehehe.
i went to the Dr on Wednesday to get the results of my biopsy from my surgery a few weeks ago. What was removed came back beign. *big sigh of relief* No cancer, the chances were slim but still you fret and worry.
Bad news is the flu is running rampant through my office. And i now have it. So miserable and sick. So much for the weekend. Ugh.
Until Later,
nienna
Posted at 5:55 PM
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Tuesday, February 17, 2009
-Monday Woes-
Ok i am still alive and kinda kicking. The weekend kicked my ass thats for sure. Have to remember to beat my sister for introducing me to Pornstars.
Too worn out to write much today.
Until later,
nienna
Posted at 3:43 PM
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Sunday, February 15, 2009
-Hungover Sunday-
Ohhhhh!!!! For those who do not know, Pornstars are brutal. Its a drink you Perverts. They are fruity and go down like water. i forgot how many i had after the first 10. That would likely explain why i'm so hungover today.
Tried to get some housework done but it just wasnt happening. At least the guys at the bar were hot and friendly.
If i survive this hangover i'll be back tomorrow.
nienna
Posted at 3:10 PM
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Saturday, February 14, 2009
-Le Sigh-
i find recently my self esteem and confidence in myself as well as my appearance has taken a major blow. i can feel myself sinking into feeling sorry for myself and i hate it. Damn him for making me feel this way, makes me want to crush him for the games he played. And he knows who he is.
Do you get off coming to my blog and reading about the pain you have caused me, but arent man enough to face me and explain yourself?
i hope it was worth it.
nienna
P.S. i track who comes to my blog, so i know You keep coming here.....either face me or leave me alone.