Greetings from nienna
A place for me to muse, rant and mutter to herself.
Remember that these are my thoughts and may not always jive with your own. Note: This blog contains Adult Material and is not suited for those under 18 years of age.
nienna
xxx
This is a touchy subject for me. i have spent years being lied to and decieved. Little white lies meant to prevent me from becoming upset or hurt. To me a little white lie is no different than a big lie. It is still being dishonest. And considering the Lifestyle i choose to live, being dishonest does not build a good trust foundation.
Why this topic? Well to be honest it was brought to my attention when i was telling friends at work that Armour is arriving here next Wednesday evening. A few of the girls made good natured jokes about what if the Man i see isnt the Man from the pictures. Not that it made me think He was being dishonest with me. But it made me think about honesty and the online dating scene. Especially in BDSM. Why? Because being honest is so important to build the foundation of trust. It got me to thinking about stories i have heard in the past. People meeting online and then meeting in person, but the person who arrives is nothing like the image they sent.
Please dont think this is something superficial as it isnt. Or perhaps it is in a way now that i think about it. However the image is what we first see of the person. It forms a place in our minds and that form grows as we get to know the person. To me it makes no sense to be dishonest about that. Its a pretty obvious that if you plan to meet you will be found out. And then what are you left with? Someone who's feelings are hurt for being lied to and trust built shaken perhaps beyond repair.
Armour and i spoke of this last night. He made a good point and one i agree with. Why would He be dishonest about something like that when we are going to meet. As well as put in the time, effort, money spent and emotional energy into slowly beginning to build my trust in Him as well as His trust in me.
For myself i trust Him and believe that He is who He is. Yes how He looked drew me in for a closer look at the Man Himself. i'm not afraid or ashamed to admit that. i was at first afraid that the Man wouldn't be as welcoming as the smile i saw in His picture. i have never been so happy to be wrong. He is more gorgeous on the inside then He is on the out. Treats me well and i know will take care of me. And that is the important part.
